Miracle Corona Cure? Corn Flour!
Have you had it?
Stuffed up your nose on a week-long bender?
With your old fella hoisted up like the Jolly Roger and your belly just a pasted mess?
Well now those in the know are saying Corn Flour has some other wonderful properties that may come in handy in times like these...
Sideshow Scott’s Covid19 Show & Tell
User Rating: 5 / 5
WHEN THE LEVY BREAKS WHO GETS A LIFESAVER?
While some like my other half are lucky because their employers could arrange it so they are able to work from home, 37 per cent of Australia’s workforce are at risk of job loss because businesses and workplaces have ceased operation due to the novel coronavirus pandemic.
“Thousands have already lost their jobs, while others face the prospect of unpaid time off should they need to self-isolate or become sick, ” according to ABC News.
Read more: Sideshow Scott’s Covid19 Show & Tell
Lockdown, Lemmings & Locusts
Slower than a speeding mollusc, weaker than a newborn kitten, unable to leap matchboxes in a single bound. Look! Up in the sky! It’s a turd. It’s a drain! It’s Scrotty from Marketing!
Yes, folks, Australia has officially gone off the cliff.
“Australia has now sprinted past 1,000 cases, with the number doubling over each of the past three days, and it is likely this acceleration is only the beginning”, according to an online report in The Guardian.
Marketing genius thinking a thunk
HAIRCUTS, QUEUES & COVID BLUES
User Rating: 5 / 5
Coronavirus by the Numbers
Australians still do not realise the seriousness of the COVID19 pandemic and Sideshow Scott and the federal government’s fumbling, bumbling response is not helping get that crucial message across.
The insurance industry takes is seriously though.
Read more: HAIRCUTS, QUEUES & COVID BLUES
Scotty from Marketing & COVID19
What a difference a week makes.
Get off the roof and get in the bunker!
A few choice online news headlines say it all:
The Daze of Wine and Coronavirus
User Rating: 5 / 5
With the wheels falling off the federal government, the “economy” and that arcane maze of bullshit and debasement called Centrelink, I braved the outside world to tramp to Woolwarts where the only people wearing protective faces masks and rubber gloves were some of the staff.
Customers milled about with impunity. Hello-ooo?
Read more: The Daze of Wine and Coronavirus
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Pithy Quote
Bloke comes into the kitchen. Takes a frog out of his pocket, sets it down in front of his wife. Wife: "What's that?" Bloke: "It's a cock-sucking frog." Wife: "What do you expect me to do with that?" Bloke: "Teach it to cook, and fuck off."
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