Damn it’s hard to make a living nowadays. Especially since that in just about every country you have to compete with some Wing Chung Bung undercutting you with cheap imports. But fortunately new psychological research and economic studies have revealed a new way to do business and to make your fortune In fact it could be said to be even more than this; it is really a new ideal for living. So here are the 5 Steps to Wealth!

I spent hours at the computer researching so you can make money!

1. Get people to work for you. Lots of people; for the more you have the more you make. Bangladeshis will work for little.
2. Buy a TV station. I hear they are going cheap nowadays.
3. Get the GST off Tissues!
4. By preying on the sick and the weak minded it can be quite easy to make money. Any scam will do but often ‘quick  and easy’ cancer cures can get you a few bucks.
5. Start a ‘Think Tank’. These fuckwits have been doing it for years and all they do is basically churn out whatever some rich prick pays them too. Give them some competition and start your own!

So there you have it. I've given you all the information you need. Now get off your arse and go out there and make some money!

The story of a bitter twisted man and me…

I’ve never had much truck with those philosophers. I am sure enough me own brain is encased in all the wisdom that it ever needs.

God given, etc… I am no Greek reader.

Reason. There is no other pill to take, so swallow the one that makes you ill.

But when these bastards of intellect swoop down from high and demand I counter them with Reason I do get all hot and sweaty.

I don’t have to answer them! I know what I feel! The demons are real, the ghosts I see alive. My Christ-ridden cross true enough.

For me.

Since when did any Greek anus pumping faggot have a say so over my mind? Never! Not in my lifetime.

Reason they call it. Slurring it out their mouths like some banged up gumbo of the mind. The Reason for it is… Your thinking lacks Reason…

Like a bartender with a poison you can’t refuse they bring their Reason…

Fuck them! I know there aint no reason or rhyme; that’s what my good book says. That’s what my squished up pile of neurons tell me everyday. I fuck I eat I walk I shit; don’t need no Aroistotlean Reason to do so!

So I have grabbed that snake Reason and fought it. I fought it hard and I fought it long. Squeezed the wretches neck until it dribbled out all its logic in a white gooey mess.

But even then the bastard stood up again, and as it shot me a scathing eye hissed out these words…

“You don’t think. Just believe”

Well I'll be!

And with that I grasped the sonofabitch and rent it’s spleen in two.

I was done. It was done.

And, like that cunt in the bible, I rested. On the porch. With a fifth…

No thinking for me; just believing.

Dear Boxhead,

Is there any truth - core or non-core - to the rumour that if Tony Abbott wins the federal election he plans to replace Julie Bishop as Deputy PM with that cosmopolitan, silver-tongued man of the world Cory Bernardi?

Your sincerly,

Norman Mailer

Hi Norman,

Back from the dead are ya? Written any new books? If not why not ya lazy prick.

I must admit here in the Box I usually don’t give much thought to politics, my mind is often turned towards more lofitier ideals…

Death... Taxes... And pussy...

But I thought I’d take a look at this Cory Bernardi bloke you're talking about.

Struth! What a fuckwit this guy is. Imagine this creep and Abbott running the country. It'd be like the fucking Opus Dei was in charge!

I thought we got rid of this type of numbnut when Bob Santamaria was sent to heaven… Christ on a stick...

So what to do? Well for the time being I'm doing nothing, cause I reckon ya average Aussie will wise up to these losers and not vote for them. But if these clowns do get up at the next election, then fuck it I'm bailing mate!

Yours,

Boxy

An occasional foray into the world of Pastoral Spiritual Care…

Nowadays it is hard for an average Joe and Joanne to find their spiritual healing. The rat race keeps racing, work never ends, and we have a phone up every orifice.

Where can a lazy soul find the quick and easy spiritual solace we all need?

In days of old we could turn to the local church or mosque, where some over-entitled blowhard would pound the sins of the world into our face. But we are over that now. We want someone who can tell us how good we really are, and all we have to do is wish very hard and we can all be rich. And we want to hear it from the comfort of our living rooms.

So I’ve scoured the internet and found who today’s new Spiritual Healers are. These modern day marvels can lift your spirit and lighten your wallet in no time…

First up Pastor Rick Warren.

Look at this fuckwit. Here he is with Oprah discussing how life is like a pack of cards.

How about no, that is just rubbish. Actually you are just another dodgy God botherer trying to fleece any fool stupid enough to believe you and your bible laden crap. Unfortunately this cunt has made millions from just doing that.

And I reckon he 'found' the cards for god idea from this

However, if you like your spiritulity tame, blind, and stupid; Rick is the man for you. In fact his rubbish is a perfect mirror of the 'close your eyes and wish' mentality of most of the USA.

Next we will look at the other purveyor of dumbass spirituality for the bourgeois, the Dalai Lama.

I suppose ‘keen’ is the right word. Could also use ‘well practiced’. Even ‘strong wristed’ would do. Whatever the case, I’ve been doing it lots and now I want to take the next step.

Sex with women.

Or perhaps Men. Or maybe as a first move I should practice with animals…

And what I’m thinking is that I should report how it goes. Maybe the readership here can give me some tips on what to do. How to get it.

I’ve been investigating some avenues; particularly what the online world can offer. I’ve started Skouting and Webchatting.

I hope they are really women I’m talking to.

My life may seem miserable but I’m trying to perk it up. Pulling myself up by the bootstraps rather than cock for a change. If by spilling the beans here I can give some hope to the hopeless, some belief for the despairing, then perhaps I have done some good in this world. My reasoning is that God gave me a cock so by God I better use it.

For what he intended.