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Home Artist Poets Corner I’m a Cronulla fella

I’m a Cronulla fella

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A poem from Australia's Heartland...

I’m a Cronulla fella

I hate ragheads, Asians, and spics.
I like to spend my time on the beach,
Me and me mates always full of piss.
Our Aussie Rag is my Holy flag;
I hoist it everyday in me backyard.
And when I need to have a shit I use it to wipe my hairy arse.
Why? Cause I’m a Cronulla Fella.

I fucking hate youse all;
You smell and stink.
Me? I’m gunna be King of it all
Cause I’m a Cronulla Fella.

There is a man on the radio;
I listen to him everyday.
Tells me its tough down here on our Struggle St.
Oh Alan you are a hero to me and me mates;
Won’t you visit our dunnys
So we can fuck your arse in the good old Cronulla Way!

This summer is gunna be one long brawl.
Any of youse cunts come down here we will fuck you all.
The Aussie flag is gunna fly high
Because in the Shire we are all Good Old Cronulla Fellas!
Comments (27)add comment

Venting Wasabi said:

This could well be the new Aussie national anthem! I'm sure John Hanson PM would approve!
October 19, 2006

Eric said:

Why don't you drop dead you limp dick Aussies?
October 19, 2006

Chato said:

Our brave boys are preserving Oz property values for Jesus by fighting The Islamic Hun in Iraqistan.
Dear Jesus, John and Alan, why do they not understand our special local ways?
October 19, 2006

Oversight said:

I haven't seen any Aussies fight at cronulla, but I did notice a few boys pretending they know how to fight.

All I could do was laugh.

Pathetic..


October 19, 2006

Freddy said:

I like it. Its full of vim and vigor; like all good Aussies.
October 20, 2006

Unregistered said:

What's duller than Cronulla if not an Oz dullard? Maybe an irritating Irwin, or a horrid Howard. Perhaps a creepy Costello. How about a bloated Beazley?
October 20, 2006

radical lefie said:

are'nt humans such wonderful caring and compassionate creatures? me thinks definitely NOT. so sad.
October 20, 2006

Dreck said:

Kill all uncompassionate humans. Rejects!
October 21, 2006

Chato said:

I hate hate! I'll crush fascism under the heel of my jackboot!
October 21, 2006

A.Jones said:

Has it got a tune? I can get a Boys Choir in to sing it on my show.

Hmmmm... Boys Choir...
October 22, 2006

Unregistered said:

Hi Alan, I'm a shy schoolboy and I would like you to introduce me to the manly values that Liberal Party arsewipes embrace.
October 23, 2006

Ricardovitz said:

Fascism is the o­nly sure way to ensure peace among the people of the world.  Jesus Christ was a fascist, and when all come to know him, The Lord will enforce peace among the remaining disciples of humanity.  All Hail Our Lord, and grant unto us eternal peace.
October 23, 2006

Unregistered said:

Jesus had a beard...Adolf had a little-bitty moustache.

I see the connection!
October 23, 2006

Crikey! said:

Adolf was God?
October 23, 2006

LordyLordyLordy said:

No. He just had facial hair like that lay-about Jew from bethlehem.
October 23, 2006

Chato said:

Jesus was OK. He just never was actually born, or crucified etc., that's all...
Otherwise he was a good fella - just not a Cronulla fella - or an actual fella.
October 24, 2006

Der Williekopf said:

Imagine Jesus on the beach at Cronulla...wading in from the Pacific in a 2nd coming.
They'd probably stone him thinking he was a Muslim!
October 26, 2006

Unregistered said:

They might think he was a sting-fucking-ray!
"THE BARB OF GOD STRIKES DOWN THE SINFUL!"
October 26, 2006

Tom said:

He's gonna be here soon
October 26, 2006

Ricardovitz said:

The 2005 Cronulla riots were started by muslim youth mobs who were confrontatied by Anglos in and around Cronulla a beachfront suburb of Sydney. The violence soon spread to other suburbs around Sydney.

On Sunday, December 11, 2005 (significance to "September 11") approximately 5000 people had gathered in a protest to "reclaim the beach" from recently-reported incidents of assaults and intimidatory behaviour by groups of non-locals, who had been identified as Middle Eastern youths from the suburbs of Western Sydney. The crowd had assembled following a series of earlier confrontations, and an assault o­n three volunteer lifeguards by nefarious muslim youth which had taken place the previous weekend. This was widely seen as the "tipping point" after years of intimidation, mostly directed at white female beach goers, with threats of violence, rape, stone throwing, and other unlawful behavior toward females by the Muslim Youth.   In the week leading up to the major incident of the 11th, these confrontations and the subsequent circulation of anonymous calls to gather at the beach — spread via text messaging and other means were effective in getting the point across that Muslim animals will not be tolerated in Australia.  The crowd initially assembled without incident, but violence broke out after a large segment of Middle Eastern men started to throw stones at the Anglo-Celtic crowd.  The Antlo-Celtic croud then chased sever men of Middle Eastern descent, o­n in particular into   a hotel. The ensuing violence soon became widespread, as many Muslim men were waiting to ambush the Australians when they followed the trouble makers to an unspecified location;

The following nights saw further incidents of violence and vandalism by people of Middle Eastern descent in Cronulla and surronding suburbs, large gatherings of protestors around western Sydney.
_______________________________________________________ ____________

Niiiiiiice.  What do you Australian Muslim lovers think of the vermin now?

October 27, 2006

Chato said:

Obviously the sub-humans have infested the planet, and it is time that the Chatoist storm troopers restored order and decency, as prescribed in The Book Of Saint Chato, The Only True Prophet.
Too long have we of God's elite tolerated the petty argumentation of you pod-people. Enough! We are coming after you all, with herbicide...
October 27, 2006

Venting Wasabi said:

Take em all and put in a sack and dump them in the bay - wrapped in the national flag, of course!
October 27, 2006

LordyLordyLordy said:

Listen Ricky it wasn't that bad. Just some lads blowin off steam.

And I'm quite sure if there was more coppers there both Cronulla fella and Muslim would have joined forces against their ultimate enemy: The Police.
October 28, 2006

me said:

MUSLIM SCUM
SPREAD THE WORD

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjFh4wR2QcM

http://mosquewatch.blogspot.com/2008/04/die-non-muslim-scum.html

http://littlegreenfootballs.com/weblog/?entry=29201_Wafa_Sultan_on_Al_Jazeera&only
July 18, 2008

Ricardovitz said:

Ain't named 'em yet. Thinkin I might name him Mohamed-Killer
July 21, 2008

Sad said:

You should call him Pity, because I already feel sorry for him. Poor dog.
July 21, 2008

Ricardovitz said:

know what ter call mah dawg! I sho'nuff gonna call him Howard the dawg. I gets ter call him Howard 'cos he licks Ricky's butt clean an he wags his houn'dawg tail whiles he's a doin it!
July 21, 2008

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