KICK OUT THE JAMS MOTHERFUCKERS!

Saturday, 09 October 2004 By TEX LUMBAGO

In our 20 year history Xenox News has been a proud supporter of direct political action in Australia. Whether it be burning schools down that teach creationism or defacing churches with graffiti; you name it - we've done it!


And now we release to you, our wonderful readers, techniques for disrupting tomorrow’s election so that turd Howard is sent packing!

 

1. Piss in the ballot box. That’s right. Walk up to it, flop it out and fill it up! Do it at about 5pm when the thing is chockers. Those candyassed vote counters won't want to touch them votes! Make sure you choose a voting spot that has a high proportion of Howard lovers.

2. Move Liberal banners closer to the actual voting rooms. There is a law that states they can only be within 10 meters otherwise they lose the votes.

3. Print out some dodgy how to vote cards for your electorate.

4. Paste Howard and Hyacinths head on some porno pics and stick them up in the voting cubicle.

5. When you step up and get you name crossed off the roll check out other names on the page that haven’t been crossed off. After you've voted come back and use those names so you can vote again (this idea is so good Im gunna do it tomorrow for sure!).

There you have it. Just a few handy hints to make sure you can do all you can to make sure the Rodent gets the flick.

And Xenox News recommendation for the election:
Vote for the no-GST party!

Tex Lumbago

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