Where have all the Johns gone?

They say that Johns go in threes.


John Howard, and now John Laws.
How can we go on? Who will be next?
Both Johns also went mad around the
time of their leaving public life.
Maybe a virus is involved.
Should we mount a "John Watch" to try
to preserve our remaining Johns?

Who will offer us a bald head to kiss?
Who will do a "power stumble" in public
for the cameras to gawk at?
Where do we listen to non-core promises
whispered romantically in our ears
while we are in a TV-induced trance?

It is all too sad - my keyboard is
damp with TEARS (you bastards!).

I fret that soon we may start to lose
our Alans or our Gerards...
.oOo.
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  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 18 years ago
    Gerard is okay - in his distraught state he has latched onto Rudd as a substitute father-figure. He reckons that Rudd is just the same as Howard, and thus lays the groundwork for future suckholing. Who cares what happens to Alan anyway?
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 18 years ago
    Having read a fair bit of wailing and gnashing of teeth from the internet John-lovers, it seems that a fair percentage of his fandom comprises Beavis and Butthead clones. These are some of the most palpably retarded and awful personalities I have ever come across. The fact that they are ignorant and inarticulate as well as vicious and cowardly just adds to the awfulness.
    Well, they did not save their repellent hero, and I wonder if they paradoxically helped in his defeat.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 18 years ago
    Kiss that.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 18 years ago
    Alas, Garrett's skull lacks the flavour of the non-core arse-hole, say the John lovers.
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