Jesus Was A Zombie
Wednesday, 12 March 2008 By YUGO
Yes it's nearly Easter time. The time when the Christian world celebrates the overcoming of death by their lord and saviour Jesus H Christ. But people in Haiti and other Voudoun cultures do this all the time. This period of the saviour's life certainly fits the definition of a Zombie. He died, was entombed and rose from the dead. However there is no record of him having cravings for fresh human brains or is there....???
What about eating his body and his blood during communion? Cannibalism doesn't appear to be a sin either. Or maybe it was metaphorical as christianity has tried to devour everybody's brain since the First Council of Nicea in 325 AD. This council was basically a gathering of publishers and editors deciding what would and wouldn't be in the in the Bible. Who know's what they cut out. There are some tantalising clues. Jesus had a go at making Zombies himself. Remember Lazarus?
In recognition of Jesus the Holy Zombie we should all make chocolate zombie cake this year.