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I am also looking for some advice on horticulture matters. As I am lacking a green thumb I am wondering what are the easiest ways to grow plants of the hallucinogenic variety?Got any tips for a brother Ricky?Yours stoned and flying,Trev

I wanna grow flowers. Maybe have them poking out of my ass.

Who would be fool enough to charge for internet news?

What he said

When will you guys start charging for access to the News? Nothing free has value, right?

Gotta have yer land first. You can farm somethin on jest 'bout most land - gotta know dirt. Dirt, seasons, 'n plantin times - fertilizer 'n bug juice help some. But lLand 'side to a branch that floods now 'n then is a good bet fer fine soil. Tain't none better. Still gotta fertilize. I got some fields run 'long side a branch off Stekoa creek. Good fer growin: blackberries, corn, cabage, muscadine, tomatos - even got a apple orchard. Thar's two companies in town that make all kind of jams, jellies, and whatnot from my blackberries muscadine 'n apples. I sell 'm all my #1's. Road-side stands git my #2's. I got me a feller who can process all my culls, if ya know what I mean. Corn fetches a good price - 'n what dern't sell goes ta my processin boy - fetches even better. Anywhoo - 10 acres is 'nuff fer farmin. Dern't know your climate. Better have water. I reckon yer smart to that by now. Gotta git yer field level and tilled. Plant whatever yer plantin in rows. Corn's 'bout the only thang I plant fom seed - thar rest I grow in a hothouse 'n then plant 'em as seedlins. 'Tween them rows you is gonna trench and pour a row of 6-6-6- with minerals right next to yer plantin row. Till yer field with lots of manure. I gone ta usin plastic keep them weeds out of my berries, but tain't gotta do that - jest gotta git ta pullin weeds.

Farmers? Are they still around? I thought we replaced them with trained chimpanzees.

I'd like one chance to even get tired.Yours swinging in the breeze,Hairy Fuckedbruncle

Well it seems that the georgian layabout is not responding so maybe I can give you some advice.Firstly, the soil is the wellspring of all wealth on a farm. You must fertilise, fertilise, fertilise. I use the tried and true method of Rudolf Steiner; I burn the testicles of the animals I want to cultivate and bury the ashes deep into the soil. A few prayers to Ahriman later and you will have an abundance the envy of your neighbours.Second, a good working staff is essential. Now unfortunately we can no longer buy human chattels so you will have to do with your garden variety illegal immigrant. Here in the highlands of Virginia we have many types and I prefer to use those of a rural extraction. Pay them a pittance but don't abuse their women, this has always worked out well for me.I hope these tips help and you can have a productive and wealth generating rural enterprise.Farmer John

Stick it wherever it fits!

Where do you want it luv?

We should all be like you in-bred hillbillies, right Ricky? Brain-dead from too much home brew made from rotten potato peels and slurped out of a jam jar! Oh and by the wee, have you stopped screwing your sister yet?

Yeah but that moonshine sure tastes sweet, don't it you daft old hillbilly.

Old Pecker - that's cuz boys 'n girls is too taken up with smokin dope and guzzlin drugs. Them 'lill bastards learnt it from thar hippy dike mommies and faggoty drug-snortin daddies.

The slang of today's young is becoming lamer and lamer. The use of 'fail' to denote... fail. I blame the idiocy of current communication mediums and devices. In the old days one could use your own street argot and not be understood except by your close associates. It was a means to undermine the dominant political structures and ruling ideologies. Now it is supposedly a way to be humorous and cool; unfortunately it is neither. All it is is evidence of a fundamental lack of imagination of today's youth.So, i'll be taking my bat and ball and minding my p's and q's and heading up the peach and pears for some kip.Amen.

Kudzu dern't grow 'round here. Gits too cold in thar mountains fer it ta grab hold of much. Mostly a problem fer folks south of Habersham county. I git that thar Cogongrass nastyin up my fieds mostly. Need me some hard workin fieldhands keep it from suckin up all my fertilizer....'n cows dern't like it none fer grazin on. Tain't nothin but a worthless 'ol weed - jest like gooberment welfare tity sucklers.

I am jail breaked!Nah... doesn;t work for me.

Kudzoo problem Ricky?

Pete - ya jest sound like another queer who cain't git a honest job doin honest work. How's 'bout you git out of the scribblin business and into a pair of overalls and git to pullin weeds out of some of my fields.

Heylo, I'm Pete, and I'm a published playwright and screenwriting teacher.tweet me at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it.

"Jail Breaked"? Term for what? Rooted?Piss weak.

This is the sort of nonsense you find on the Internet. Wild accusations, half-baked arguments, and naked blonde nymphs fornicating like there is no tomorrow.Well girlys there is a tomorrow; and a big angry Jesus will be here to spank your little botties.Spottie botties...Kev! Kev! They've turned off me computer again!

Testing 1...2...3

Liberals? Labor? Fuckemall the bastards they are all in the same gang of sneaky, lying, pedophile necrophiliac corporate flunky rapist butthole surfers

That lazy arse editor is still sitting on the can. what he fuck is he doing?

A no-brainer, this. They're Amurikens, after all.

Hey Prof I want one of them Jesus dicky things now!I cant sleep without it

They are as weak as piss in the Liberal Party. What a bunch of talentless hacks.

And another rat leaves the sinking ship! http://www.theage.com.au/national/malcolm-turnbull-to-quit-politics-20100406-rnt7.html#pollAnd doesn't Turnbull look so much the happier for it in that photo?

Hey, thar Mr. Conroy! Dern't ya fergit - I'm on yer side, boy! Fight'n thar Devil in ever whcih way I can. You and me, sir - we take on thar Devil's pornography, thar Devil's fornicators, them Homosexuals - ya know them folks jest ain't right, ABORTIONISTS, even them Abortion Drug-pushers - all goin straight tar Hell!!!! I reckon I'm a big 'ol fan of yer work, Mr. Conroy, yessiree Amen!! Well, I'm a gonna keep fightin thar good fight - I reckon you keep up yer fightin like a good soldier. Jesus shines his light on us who do battle fer his good cause.

Mr Ricardovitz shouldn't you be out in the fields picking cotton? It is because of jackasses like you i have to ban the internet in Australia.

Digger, you git it all wrong. I done research Max Gross. Been follerin him fer years now. Some new-fangled folks call this syberstalkin. It ain't. Jest good 'ol honest research 'n whatnot. Anywhoo, this here Max Gross feller is a double-spy. He's a Jew, but tain't really a Jew. Git my drift..... He's one of them half-jew hatin jews. But, that nothin. He's an agent of thar CIA - Central Inteligence Agency6. Lecturs 'bout CIA spy stuff in these here spy schools they got in the USA. Max Gross is pretendin to be a Anarchist bent on destrotyin Australia. But, his genuine agenda is gittin you Aussies all frothed up at thar mouths 'n bleedin at the teeth wheres y'all toss out them Liberals, Labors, and thar rest 'n git some real land-ownin Conservatives takin over.

Fatboy, see hear! Fatboy dern't make a lick of sense jibber-jabberin 'bout extra brains bein lonely and whatnot. He dern't know nothin. dropkick this nor that, punt a fitball er a boat - all that King's English squawlk'n 's jest plain ol funny to us regular folks.Ain't ya heard, Fatboy, that thar king-nigga Obama has done outlawed fatfood 'n fat folks. Better git with thar program 'n shake some a that thar fat out of yer hind quarters, boy.

More puffed up leftie nonsense from Gross. You cant blame John Howard anymore! Australia is going rapidly backwards and filling up with reffos because of your socialist darling Kruddy. Pretty soon the country will be so bankrupt your dole cheques will be bouncing!Digger,Cranbourne

Ricardofizz you are a fucking dropkick. If you had an extra brain it would be lonely.

Great spray. More please.

Max Gross you are right on the money. The Liarberals have no interest in democracy. They believe in the divine right of kings and consider themselves royalty. Labor has betrayed its supporters and may as well form a coalition with the Liarberals. Keep spraying the sheeple with the unadulterated truth, Max. Good job, Xenox News.

Sober??? Tain't scarcely a day go by thar by ware I ain't got more wits 'bout me than all them goobermemt stooges all together. You and yer kind dern't know nothin 'bout sober. Y'all take yer drugs, pop yer pills, drink thar Devil's elixer, snort glue, huff yer meth, and inject yer smack cuz you ain't got no hard work to do. Folks like you, Miss Jane, got pills fer headaches, pills fer woman-cramps, pills fer ta let ya fornicate 'n not git no baby, pills fer killin babies after fornicatin, pills ta git you a baby when thar Lord done knows you ain't no good fer havin babies, pills ta git a pecker hard for more fornicatin, Devil-Wine fer Catholics and Jews fer pretend-prayin, corn-liquor fer ta git a man inerested in fornicatin with ugly women and ta commit lawless behavior. Y'ALL ER GOIN TA HELL!!!!!Me? I reckon my body is thar Lord's temple. I dern't sin like you weak folks do. Sure, I done my share of sinnin, yessiree, I have. Jesus done told me 'fore I need a attitued adjustment. I work on that - tain't easy with all these whores runnin 'bout, 'n wicked folks who you jest know ain't no good fer nothin! Lazy tennants, lazy gooberment titty suckers, lazy gooberment workers suckin off thar titties of productive folks. I reckon if'n I wern't no God-fearin man, I'd fix ta burnin 'em all. But, hear thar Lord preach ta me, 'n I listen to Him, 'n he keeps me on thar straight 'n narrow - don't let me bring much harm ta sinnfull folks, even though we all know they shore do deserve it.Yep, Miss Jane, I'm sober as a 4-legged Donkey.

What on earth are you raving about, sir? Your post is scarcely intelligible. Are you even sober?

Looky here, Miss Jane,Tain't nobody give a dern 'bout global warmin er changing weather. Best thang 'could happen is this here planet of ours got a tad bit warmer. All that wasted water sittin on thar north and south polls 'd be released. And places like Newfoundland would be a right nice place ta live! I reckon all that land up in Kanada wouln't go ta waste neither.Only dumb 'ol Obama-lovin dope smokers dern't knew no better. Them folks gotta have a "cause". Tain't got nothin to do, cain't git no job, cain't rub two nickels together to own no land or make sompthin of themselves. So, they smoke thar dope, inject thar drugs, chrome thar brains, like Assuie Abos, and git tharselves a sign and protest. Shoooooot, them hippy-dippy global warmin sneeple cry 'n cry 'n cry 'n waive thar signs 'round like thar world's a commin to an end lickity split. But, thar truth is, boys and girls, these here folks jest ain't got no nevermind to busy themselves with.

Nonsense Infidel! Our saviour was of good Aryan stock.

Oops, here's the link intact: http://blogs.crikey.com.au/rooted/2010/03/31/climategate-scientists-cleared-of-manipulating-data-hello-anyone-listening-hello/

Oh, and a little update on the so-called "Climate-gate" beat-up: “in the first official report into the theft of emails from the unit last year, a British parliamentary committee said the messages did not contradict the mainstream scientific view that man-made emissions have contributed to rising temperatures…” See here: http://blogs.crikey.com.au/rooted/2010/03/31/climategate-scientists-cleared-of-manipulating-data-hello-anyone-listening-hello/ But don't expect Minchin or the deniers to mention it. And its getting almost no mainstream media coverage at all.

But surely his skin pigmentation is all wrong? Given his heritage and locale, surely Mr Christ would have a big black dick? Oh and by the wee, wasn't the Shroud of Turin exposed as a fake created in the 13th Century, like most of the writings and paraphenalia relating to the so-called "Bible"?

Glomeruli?

I seen the minister many times and i say he always put on a sterling show

I wanna see how long the fucker can hold his breath underwater. Then I might not necessarily vote for anyone else.

A champion...cocksucker!

I'm on the whiskey flying!