Dear Ricky.

Dear Ricky, my boy Hunter, he screwed the pooch real bad. He took millions of dollars from Ukraine and China and didn't put that money in a Cayman National Bank like I told him to. That dumb crack-head put it all in his Wells Fargo account in Malibu California, and then transferred a bunch of it to me like I told him to. Well, we got caught. He got arrested and now he wants a pardon. The Italian Mafia Boss would never pardon such a stooge. But, I'm a senile, old idiot. Should I pardon that crack-head son of mine?

@Joe Biden Joe, I'm gonna tell ya how tar handle that boy of yers. Like in that Joo-movie when Amon Goeth pardons one of them Joos 'n then decides tar shoots 'em in thar back of 's head anyways - dat's how ya aughta pardon that drug-guzzlin boy of yers.