Mundine reduces the likelihood of terrorist attacks on Australia

Tuesday, 23 October 2001 By Pervis

Hit me!

Outspoken boxer Anthony Mundine yesterday announced his support for the terrorist attacks on the USA. Despite the massive tide of criticism against his comments, in the process he has single handedly secured the safety of the aboriginal population of Australia from anthrax and bomb attacks. His comments have also somewhat reduced the likelihood of attacks on Australia from Afghani, Indonesian, and terrorists the world over. A speaker for the Independence Resistance League, Al Kazam Sheetite, has been quoted as saying: "Well, perhaps we won't bomb the Aussie's after all; they are obviously not all mugs".

Canberra Trade Union correspondent, Tony Bongiongornio was overheard as saying "Fair Dinkum, it is only Anthony and Pauline H. so far that have stood up and questioned Australia's involvement in the attacks on the innocent civilians in Afghanistan. Those other pricks are like well oiled monkeys. If we get a reprisal from the likes of Indonesia or those angered further east only Anthony and Pauline will be able to sleep at night....the other monkey's will be going to bed with a guilty conscious for ever more."

In other late breaking news, Pauline denied there was any chance of wedding bells with Anthony, "I wouldn't marry that black bastard to keep me from going to an Indonesian gaol"

Central Arnem Land postal worker Billy Wotchem said: "The suspicious mail checker we had on went walkabout last week but after what Anthony said we don't think we'll need a replacement."

Told about Mundine's comments and referring to Australia being a democratic country where people can say whatever they like, John Howard retorted: "Its only a democracy when we want it to be"

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