Created: Wednesday, 13 December 2006 Written by ChatoOz Emperor Hogturd has a plan to return
The Howardland to prosperity, and impress
the retarded voters and God.
All to restore the lost popularity
of his noxious regime.
"I got the idea from Easter Island!" drooled
the criminally insane transgenic rodent.
"My regime will employ millions of bludgers
to construct giant stone monoliths that
shall honour noble dictators of the past.
I believe the Gods will be pleased and will
shower the deserving wealthy with even more
Shaking with the tremors associated with
deepening senility, general psychosis, and
the brain-damaging effects of the neurotoxic
neuroleptic drugs that have been prescribed
to control his insane outbursts, the true
friend of the working class, raved-on, with
the foam of mania dripping from his bloated
"The first erection shall be to that moral
giant, Pinochet, then the great paragon of
christian virtue, Maggie Thatcher!
Pol Pot and Hitler have a special place in
my affections, and you cannot imagine the
moral agonies I experienced in trying to
receive guidance from The Lord about who
shall be the first to be erected in stone.
Being fair is always my first concern when
paying respect to the ruling classes!
Our first concerns should always be about
honouring dead and semi-dead dictators."