Miracle Corona Cure? Corn Flour!

Have you had it?

Stuffed up your nose on a week-long bender?

With your old fella hoisted up like the Jolly Roger and your belly just a pasted mess?

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Well now those in the know are saying Corn Flour has some other wonderful properties that may come in handy in times like these...

Imagine. You are trapped in a world of tiny infecting particles. Walking thru a miasma of people’s snot and expectorations. The fear grasping you by the gonads. This tiny little virus lurking on every corner, in every stuffed nosed kid’s gob. Just waiting to find a home in you.

Well buddy it ain’t no dream. This is the truth!

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If you ain't shitting yourself you should be.

 

It is an abomination, that's for sure. And as for all the wonders of modern science... Well what have those cunts got for us?

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Sweet fuck all!

Those fuckers will be happy to lets us rot. Our lungs filling up with goo while they are safe in their labs, spoon fed millions by the Government, and banging away on their sweet PhD students. Meanwhile us hoi polloi are getting royally screwed by this tiny menace with no help on the horizon.

No. Forget them. Or at least the establishment ones. For our Prof Williams years ago discovered the amazing benefits of corn flour. The Essence of the Gods. He showed not only could it heighten your comprehension, tighten your tummy, and have you in sexual ecstasy for weeks, but it also has medicinal properties too.

Such as anti-viral properties!

I reckon there is no time to wait. Forget the Hydrochlroquine or whatever crap that crazy French Prof is selling. Try the corn flour. Cheap. Easy. Convenient.

Feel a tickle in the schnozzer? Take a hit!

Throat getting scratchy? Line up a line!

Lungs swimming in goup? Send that shit deep into my veins!

Corn Flour. God's gift to the world.

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Use it or lose it suckers!

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  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    Thank you. In this hell hole of a time, the ability to imbibe any substance that can alter my reality is welcome.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    Don't have any corn flour but I've got polenta. Should I give that a try?
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    I got polenta too... I will soak it overnight first.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    @B Jeezuz For fucks sake don't soak the corn flour! You will never get it out of your nose. It'll be like snorting Clag for fucks sake!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    @Stoned out of my tiny gourd Hey no worries! I take it in an enema.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    @B Jeezuz Don't you think that would also cause a problem? Imagine if it clagged your rear end? Definitely a problem.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    @Worried, Robinson No problemo. Dun it before. It all comes out in the end.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    @B Jeezuz I took it. And now... Where is my mind? Where is my mind.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    Snort'n corn liquor be a lot better fer ya than corn pone dust.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    Alllll you boys 'n girls from Australia is gonna git the Big Freeze commin yer way. Winter gonna be cold fer y'all, 'n why? Cuz this is Global Coolding times. Shephards trails ';n franz gootenglock all y'all stanky 'opl gibber bones. Froooooze, yes indeed, it' sain't gonna be good. No sirree.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    Y'all be a wast'n good corn fer mak'n dummied up cures for no nevermind. They dern't neven have no corn in Australia. Ain't git no corn whisky neither. Injuns bring us the corn. Abos 'll explode if'n they try ta eat corn - like feed'n meth to doggies.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    Don't try this at home!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 6 years ago
    Had the corn.
    Got the Horn.
    Had the Horn. Took tha Corn

    Simple as that Brudders &Sistas!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 4 years ago
    I hear Corn Flour is particularly potent against the Omicron...

    All variants in fact.
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