My plea to our Alien betters... Please Save Us!

1 minute read

Mother Earth.

We have fucked her red raw.

And now she is infected with a disease of our own making.

And her temperature, it soars.

20230705 070849 20230705 1207949031

 

1000008243 20230718 1471958678

"Addicted to the remains of others,

That we burn with wanton abandon.

On a crash course over the cliff,

Brother Alien won't you hear our plea?"

 

 

Brother Alien. Send down the craft and get me the fuck off this crazy God's Golfball!

Re engineer the plants

 

She's not bad... just Genetically Mean...

 

People, I tell you: "What will be done? Nothing!"

 

So therefore I am taking responsibility personally for myself and loved ones. I have made a Universal Symbol and broadcast it to the heavens:

"Brother Alien! Get me off this rock!"

antartic sea ice 20230704 1364703584

 

 

 

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  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    Too many graphs. Can't we just have some memes instead please.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    Why would they bother? I reckon those alien fuckers are just watching and laughing at us.
    Twirling their anteenas and probing their proboscis. Floating up there in their Flying Saucers. Occasionally buzzing some local yokel.
    No, there is no way they are gunna give a fuck about us.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    Well they certainly wouldn't want to save riff-raff like you Trev. As intelligent beings, I am sure the Aliens will pick the ones deserving of rescue. And undoubtedly it will be those of us who have made it to the top of the pile by hard scrabble and intelligence.
    You know, like me.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    Stop yer cry'n ya lazy good fer nothi'n weather weirdo. It's hot, so jest git ta work 'n pick me some cotton, boy.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    Catania, Sicily. First European mass casualty event of the oncoming apocalypse.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    Cheeseburgers are too expensive
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    @Crocasaurus And for this we must destroy the planet? Our little ark in the Universe?
    Children, you are all children. Your minds warped by the farting noise off the internet.
    There will be no internet the way things are going! The wires are melting. The intercontinental cables will be ripped in two by the cataclysmic waves that will roil the seas!
    Sonny, forget the Cheeseburgers. Get out there and kill your boss. It is your only hope!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    If ya tain't git no land, ya tain't git no food, no drink, no still, no negros pick'n yer Maters, no tenants pay'n rent 'n noth'n tar shoot invaderes on!!!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    We are the disease. Now what? Innoculate the planet from ourselves? What do parasites do when their host becomes unsustainable? Bail out! Beam me up Scotty! (And Uhura)
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 2 years ago
    This is no joke. I was abducted by aliens when I was 17. They were very nice to me. They mean us no harm. One of them taught me how to pleasure myself. I was quite grateful for that.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 2 years ago
    I think it a joke Janice. And a rather offensive one at that.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 1 years ago
    @Gina R, Perth It wasn't enough receiving billions of dollars in Australian government subsidies (welfare) was it Gina? Nor buying a Singaporean citizenship so that you don't have to pay back any of it in tax to help our country. Even interstellar aliens abhor traitorous grifters so I don't think you will be hitching a ride anywhere.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 1 years ago
    @Tax Paying Aussie Worker She's be too fat for the spaceship in any case. Disrupt the gravitational force field she would.
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