AUSSIE PM HERR FUCKEDNUCKLE: “MY PLANS FOR AUSTRALIA!”

Oh the trappings of political power soon go to the head of those unwise enough to succumb to its lure!

 

Here is a story of an ordinary fellow who got caught up in extraordinary events and became the most powerful man in Australia.

 

A simple man who prior to gaining office loved nothing more than twanging his wire alone in his room.

 

Trapped in a whirlwind of slogans, theology, ideology, and plain old sexual perversion; Herr Fucknuckle rose out of the turgid miasma of existence that are the eastern suburbs of Melbourne to transform the once great nation of Australia into a writhing pit of sexual deviance, incest,  buggary, and casual misdemeanors.

He blew apart the safe ways of previous governments. Political thought; political power; had never assumed that such an insignificant man (“That tiny little wanker” one pundit called him) could wreck such havoc on them. But when he strode into the Lodge as head of the “Get the GST off Tissues Party Canberra was never the same again.

 

Pitching for the Country Folk Vote!

 

Once made King of Australia his first port of call was that bumbling Senator Conroy. Herr Fuckedyouruncle wasted no time in wielding his broom of popular mandate and swept this reactionary fart aside. Like Lenin he wanted a new form of government. Like Lincoln he wanted to let all people have their wicked way. And like Churchill he liked to fuck little boys.

 

After pummeling Conroy he moved onto other recalcitrants of the Australian Political Scene. Male or Female he showed no favour or bias; all were ripe for his hard blade of blood and flesh.

 

As an example old Bronny Bishop was rogered over the speaker’s chair like some cheap tramp. The public gallery roared their approval, the press gallery bowed their head. Laurie Oakes was heard to moan “Oh! The shame of it all!”

 

 

Not if anymore… we have the leader we all deserve :)

 

“If I have been elected PM then it must be I am wont to do what the people will,”

PM Fuckednuckle opined,

“and so I shall. From the highest hilltop to the squeakiest beach I will resurrect this great brown land!”

 

Being such an open character he had nothing to fear from Wikileaks. In fact upon hearing of young Aussie Assange’s antics Herr Fuckedandsticky appointed him Minister of Communications and Female Affairs.

 

Who said politics couldn’t be fun?

 

World Leaders congratulate Herr Fucknuckle on his 2010 election victory!

 

PM Fudgeknuckle has a long record of public utterances that indicate a fevered mind always looking for a better future, a longer life, a new ideal for living…

 

International relations? He is on the case!

 

The arts. Did you say the arts? He is a poet! A lorikeet of rhyme!

 

On matters of faith; always a supporter.  A true believer in all religions.

 

 

What do we want from our leaders? That is the question that drives PM Fucknuckle…

 

Be thankful we live in a time when we have his guidance; with his magic wand of flesh and blood he will lead all us Aussies onto a future of brightness and cream!

 

 

Oh Australia! There is no greater evil then the one you are with...

 

People in conversation:
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  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    PM Herr Fuckyouruncle!

    May he long rule over us!

    I'm pulling for Australia - ARE YOU?
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    I forgot to set the alarm clock.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    Great article. PM Fucknuckle seems like the go-getting reformist leader we at CommBank and the IPA have been longing for.

    What we would like to know is how long before he does the right things like:

    Privatise Army
    Sell ABC
    Coupon based education
    Ban collective labor bargaining


  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    I think the lesson here is that when power falls into the hands of the unprepared chaos develops.

    And I reckon we will see that with Bailleau and upper class twit mates soon. But they are unlikely to suffer; again it'll be your average working class Joes who will have to carry the can...
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    What would you prefer, chaos or unfettered government corruption. At least there is one thing we can be certain of.... the haemoraging has been temporarily reduced.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    Chaos ain't so bad... It is where capitalism ends - right after it sells it's gravedigger the shovel.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    All I want from PM Fucknuckle is what every decent Aussie expects...

    That their house value will continue to increase.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    Australia is being damned for having such a pevert PM. The great flood of Queensland is just the beginning. Expect more in 2011 as our lord God punishes those who mock him and his son who died for your sins.

    I hope all those that voted for PM Pevert reap the whirlwind that they have sowed!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    It is indeed a lucky country to be blessed with such a leader.

    Our future is in safe hands it seems.

    Onwards PM Fucknuckle; lead us all to prosperity and enjoyment!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    Maybe KRuddy could adopt some Herr F's horny proposals... I'm sure that will get the ALP caucus back on board with him.

    He has gotta be better than Julia or Tony!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 15 years ago
    You may have been a dimwit PM Herr Fuckedknuckle but at least you didn't lie about a Carbon tax like the current harpy in the Lodge!

    Digger,

    Cranbourne
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 7 years ago
    That Bishop looks like the new pope! Well predicted Herr Fucknuckle. Australia needs men of your calibre and perversion more than ever.
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 3 years ago
    @Horny Trev Not only Australia Trev. If only we had the Fucknuckle guiding us all from Washington DC...
    What a difference that would make!
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 2 years ago
    Was reading this and got to thinking who is comparable to the Fucknuckle in todays world of politics?
    Then it struck me. Argentine fuckwit Javier Milei. Wonder where he stands on the GST on tissues?
  • This commment is unpublished.
    · 2 years ago
    @LordyLordyLordy Make that President Javier Milei!
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