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None of those wankers would be employable, they MUST retain their seats! Maybe the Mafia would have some of them...
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

Hopefully they will give Howard the Iraqi ambassador role. I'm sure the people in Baghdad will welcome their "liberator" with open arms.

I can't speak for Chato, but I'll be happy to see the horrible little cunt go!
I think Chato might want the monkey to get a fair trial before he is skinned alive, or strung-up!
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

My apologies to The Dark One:
May The *Lord* bless you, Pastor Pervy.
Fancy using lower-case for The Lord. There will be Hell to pay...
- Reverend Veddy Pleasant-Fellowes

I may be somewhat confused by the similar names. Still, one never forgets depravity, but then we get to see so much of it among the faithful, don't we?
May the lord bless you, Pastor Pervy, and may there not be too much wailing and gnashing of teeth! (--Matt. 13:49,50.)
- Reverend Veddy Pleasant-Fellowes

Are you sure Rev P-F? My research fails to find any mention of these characters in the history of EB.

I do believe the men were Ben Doon and Phil McCavity. Men of extraordinary depravity!
- Reverend Veddy Pleasant-Fellowes

When Churchill visited the troops at El Alamein he arrived a week after the battle was fought. Thanks to the censorship and media control at the time the BBC reported it as if he was there when the fighting was on.

Winston Churchill was a coward of the first order. I am amazed that any Australian would support a man who so obviously regarded your country as little more than a pool of useful bodies to be sacrificed on his whim (ie Gallipoli and Singapore).

Dont worry chato latest polling suggests PM Howard is on the way out.

It wasn't Jock McCrabb who was in charge of the EB. It was Phil McCrevice.
My apologies.

Pastor Pervy

He of the atrophied testicles? The roundheaded Polish prick?

Ricky, this may help you to understand:-
So shall it be at the end of the world: the angels shall come forth and sever the wicked from among the just, and shall cast them into the furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth.
--Matt. 13:49,50.

Ricky, my wayward children have angered me greatly, but it is only fair that I give them fair warning before I let them destroy themselves.
Those who worship John shall wail and gnash their teeth. There shall be much wailing and gnashing!

Chato blasphames the Lord and sounds the trumpets ushering in his demonic false savior. Satan has deceived you, Chato, for you have been fooled into believing that he can and will do for you what the Lord will not.

Satan wants nothing more than to harvest the wretched souls of homosexuals and drug-guzzling weak minds. The Evil One has plans for your soul, Chato, and it has nothing to do with what you believe he has promised you. YOU HAVE BEEN DECEIVED. Repent, or burn in hell for all eternity! Repent your sins and your transgressions against the Lord, Chato. Say just a little prayer and humble yourself before the Lord. Do it before it is too late.

Howard's "towering figures" amount to a towering pile of bullshit. All three of them added to the world's ongoing fuck-ups, hindered rather than helped "moral clarity". Fuckem all.

Xenox will know it has arrived when such august figures as The Rodent give laudatory speeches about it!

I heard of a terrible accident involving Viagra, a rat trap, a fridge-magnet and a kitchen blender.
Stay away from that awful stuff!
- Dick Limpman

But what a magnificent pedantic prick, Lordy!
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

Zionism is terrorism.

A snort a day keeps me happy and gay

Cap'n you (RE) are a pedantic prick!

Ricky, if you ever change your mind about the tin hat, I know someone from Hellsong Industries Screeching Choir of Death, who can get one cheap!
However, you did put my mind to rest about crazy conspiracy theories. Your clear and rational analysis makes it clear that The Bible is absolutely and literally true on every point that it makes, no matter how many times it contradicts itself.
Thank the Good Lord that John Howard is protecting us from evil with liberal sprinkles of self-raising flour! I shudder to think what would have happened if some raghead substituted anthrax spores instead!
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

The Third Testament shall be written, and Zion will be the tool God uses to resurect Mohammed on earth for one last fleeting moment before thrusting him into the firey pits of Hell, together with his deciples, to replace the weary Satan.

There ain't nothing twisted in my mind. I see things with total clarity, in vivid color, and with ordered rational reasoning. I know what's real and what is not real. I don't wear a tinfoil hat and spout off about wild and crazy conspiracy theories.

The TRUTH is as plain as the pruney looking bit of haggared flesh between a 90 year old woman's legs. It's terrifying to some; and very familiar to others. It is what it is.

The truth is that Islam is an evil religion; that true Muslims are evil people. The Jews are too weak to destroy the Muslims, and the Jews will ultimately be chopped down to an even more insignificant few than they already are. The Christians are even weaker than the Jews, but there are many more of them. Once the Jews are completely insignificant, the Christians will be slaughtered like cowering lambs by the Muslims.

But, nothing lasts forever, and evil will not reign over the world for eternity, but it will for a very long time. Mohammed will be the Second Satan, when God destroys the Evil Ones, and this too will be told to your decendants in the New Church of the Third Testament.

Please don't tell anyone, but when they got him into ICU, they discovered that the cheeky fellow had received a foreskin transplant!
- Reverend Veddy Pleasant-Fellowes

Listen you bludger, I'll suckhole as many important persons as it takes to make my nation relaxed and comfortable, and safe from self-raising anthrax flour!
- masked mystery rodent

Ricky, you are a very sour creature. Did some big kid steal one of your toys and you never got over it?
I can understand how a thing like that could twist your mind, but if you don't try to fix your condition it will inevitably get worse.
Just look at John Howard to see how this disorder can totally destroy a man's soul!
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

I was unaware that they were thelemites. I don't know about cracking a joke, but they were into cracking a fat or two!
(most pleasing to the eye of The Lord I believe)
- Reverend Veddy Pleasant-Fellowes

Lordy, it is "you're" not "your". It is Oz that needs saving. And I will do my best!
UP, UP AND AWAYYYYYYYYY!
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

He's ruled over the land of David with pride, with courage and zest so that, if and when Israel is attacked, keeping with the traditions of our fathers, Israel prevails over the infidels.
Let it be known, then, all free men are citizen of Israel, of zion, of jerusalem, of the land of christ - the king.

That XenoxNews.com is the last bastion of REAL journalism in the landscape of the Australian Media.

We will never shy away from telling the truth, no matter who it hurts. As for this story you will have to take it up with Pastor Pervy, but I have always found him to be as truthful as your average churchman.

Your the superhero Captain; your supposed to save us!

I was a member of the Exclusive Brethren and Jock McCrabb was never a leader, the EBs never used Aleister Crowley's Bible (always JND) and they certainly never had a pulpit. As far as their original teachings went, they were mostly teetotallers prior to the 60s. Is this supposed to be journalism????

It is true that people who feel compelled to make up rhyms are most likely insane. It is what the brain of a natural schizophrenic does to attempt to create order out of chaos.

Yossi, what crimes did I commit that caused me to be born and punished by Howard and his idiot supporters in this shithole of a ghost train horror ride?
For Christ's sake Kevvy, save me! (okay Jesus/Allah/Krishna/Jah/Apollo etc., you can save me. I'm not fussy under these circumstances...)
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

Yossi, I bow to your brilliance! Pustule of deceit! Wow! I owe you one.
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

The Oz public is split pretty much right the middle, thanks to Howard's fear-mongering, rat-cunning and shameless sham, but his reign of bullshit is nearing the end. His own party will eventually disown him as the depth and breadth of his calculated deceit is acknowledged. Patience, brothers and sisters, patience!

We know Blair is a fool but not an imbecile like Bush. Howard is something else: a pustule of deceit, misrepresentation and callousness.

America has lost the "war" in Iraq, jusr as it has lost the "war-on-terror". It will retire to its billion dollar bases and watch the Middle East go up in flames... If I were an Israeli, I'd be booking my flight out of Tel Aviv round about now.

If it's got a tune...I'll be dancing!

Those tunes that he pinched from other composers, you mean. Still, we must go down-market if it's about Johnny and his gang.
How about Tom Cruise as a guest star, flying the FLAG(in-joke) for Suckontology and the CLAMS(in-joke)?
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

Gee Digger, a great leader? Johnny you mean? I suppose from a suckhole perspective he could project that illusion. Who do you really think you're kidding?
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

Rudd = John Howard's love child (genome testube turkey baster experiment gone wrong)

Rudd will be another Labor dud, just like the rest of them. Latham, Crean,Beazley, all duds.
Compared to our great leader they are pathetic.

Digger,
Cranbourne

The guy is a shameless liar, full stop. What gets me is he keeps getting away with it. Whats wrong with the Oz public! Are we all so bloody dense?

Johnny IS a "biological agent". He infected a shit-load of Oz dullards with his disease!
He's the disease, I hope Rudd is part of the cure.

Have another bowl of poo, Digger!
*CAPTAIN AUSTRALIA*

Yet another of the mean munchkin's lies has caught up with him: this time its his calling a bit of flour a "biological agent" and scaring the shit out of everyone! He definitely takes his cue from Dubya! Is there nothing the old bugger won't misrepresent to his own advantage?

Abdul you ungreatful sod. My mates were there in '42 when we defended Egypt for the Empire. Winnie came and visited the troops at El Alamein on the frontline. And then we went off and killed a lot of Germans so your lot could live under benovalent Empire rule. You should be lined up and shot!

Digger,

Cranbourne

We are all screwed! Only retards need leaders to tell them what to do. I don't know what is worse - scumbucket leaders, or their hero-worshipping, poo-eating dullards.