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I'd reckon she'd be 60 something. keen as mustard I reckon.

Trev

Dear Trev,

Exactly how old is this groovy granny of yours? Like, you know she could be a granny at 40 and that aint too bad, you know. Take Pricilla Presley for example. She was a granny at an early age and she don't look too bad to me. Specially seeing as she's had heaps of plastic surgery, you could probably kiss her and eat at the Y at the same time. Kinda like killing 2 birds with the one stone if you get what I mean.

Trev? Is that your pseudonym Bill Heffernan?!

That aint no fish the PMs dangling: its Peter Costello!

What about good old Alexander DOWNER! He's apparently quite a popular gobbler in the parliamentary dunnies!

I thought it was the other way round? A padlock on every nun and a penis in every home?

Don't worry Raspberry latest polls have lil Johnny safely with his hand on Australias till.

sure you aint just repeating this shit?

Sydney perverts Association founded by Liberal Senator Bill Hefferman. Howards bum chum!

Stop it! Your just scaring me now with this stuff!

Maybe lil Johnny can give them his undies.
They could raffle them for more money.

Are you suggesting our elderly PM cant get it up? Odd, considering Johnny the Rat has been screwing the nation since 1996 (minimum!)

Yeah, I can't wait till we start launching those missiles at Indonesia!! Go Johnny Go Go GO!

Heinrich

Hey Phil you got any pictures? I'd really like to see some Lucy and Schroder action; maybe on the piano with ol Beethoven watching. Whaddya reckon? Cmon ya gotta have sumthin!

Pull the other testicle, Raspberry, it plays Onward Christian Soldiers!

But I see your tainted Tory mentor reckons "We are five and a bit weeks out from the election and we still don't know what he (Latham) stands for... People know what we stand for. "

Well, the Rodent sure got that last bit right!

Max once again your instinctive hatred of Howard overcomes your reason. If we let those so-called refugees on the Tampa into Australia that would have sent a message to people smugglers everywhere that Australia was a soft touch. Well thanks to Man'o'Steel and his loyal sidekick Ruddick we stopped them. Imagine if we didnt? We'd all be eating our food with one hand and praying to Allah!

Raspberry Cordial

"Lying rodent", eh? Methinks Brandis himself is something of a fork-tongued lizard himself!

There's no question that the PM is an unrepetant dissembler - and that's putting it politely!

George W Bush is indeed "dangerous & incompetant". He is also a religious crackpot on par with Osama bin Laden himself. That makes him doubly dangerous, and far more so than Osama could ever hope to be.

What's this crap about a "six week campaign"? The Rodent has been campaigning all year! Another six weeks of his repetitive, anal-retentive bullshit and I'll be voting for Cthulhu!

If Bush gets "4 more years" the world will get 4 more WARS!!!

Tex, what can I say except "when you're right, you're bloody well right, mate!" As for the Rodent's purported "leadership" and "experience", let's just call 'em what they really are: porkies and pork-barrels!
- Dusty Davo from Derrimut

You know, that ALMOST makes fucken sense! But wait! There's more! The little man with the biggest lies has just called the fucken election date: 9 October! Fuck! A week after the Finals! The fucken mongoloid midget! Bring on more barrels of pork, Johnny... or at least remove your fucken GST from fucken beer.
ANGRY DOG

like I said wheres my fucken lithium!
ANGRY DOG

Now I know why Max calls the fuckin dump Ausurrealia! ANGRY DOG

And what the fuuuuuuck is THIS!!!

This would be hilarious if it wasnt true! If George W Bush is re-elected the entire civilized world is in deep, deep trouble! If John W Howard is re-elected Australia is in deep, deep trouble! ( I mean, more than both are already!)

The Rodent has obviously been nibbling on African spuds!

not by thee at least...

Bingo

Sure 'nuf, but what of all the idiots that voted for him??? Now THATS scary!!!

That explains everything! -Dusty Davo from Derrimut

George W Bullshit can appoint the government of Iraq and call it "sovereign," but the government of Venezuela is appointed by its own PEOPLE!

Rescatando la sonrisa! Thank you el Presidente!

There is a room inside my head
Inside the room there is a bed
Upon that empty bed I lie
Upon that bed I crawl and cry.

- Vonda

Yeah right! Iraq is now a "democracy"! And Bush, Blair and Howard are honourable men! HA HA fucking HA!

Do we fucking bust these guys or promote them Jax?

Agent Smith

Yo! get off the yeyo!

You is looking straight in the lens of that universal camera man Mr Death

Well, I was gonna quote the first paragrpah and give you a smart arse response:

Entered the eye of your dick did it, which would make the pube all of two and a half inches long!

But instead or as well I want to tell you that I had pretty much that same dream last night except I was stone cold sober etc.

Also, and this is no bullshit, I was lying in bed having a scratch and I came across this pube that was massive in length, like a fucking hair off my head, it was so long I had to pluck the fucker to have alook at it. I was so impressed I got up and with my goofiest grin showed the hair to my missus in the kitchen. I indicated to her that it was a pube and she said 'oh yuck' and I chucked it in the bin.

Anyway, the dream last night/this morning...maybe it wasn't a dream...but I landed suddenly semi awake and realised where I was...in bed... and where I had just come from....

And then I had what some people might call madness creep over me.

In my semi-conciousness I couldn't resolve all of, what looked like petty things that we get involved with every day, within this apparently 'solid' and 'tangible' taken for granted framework of birth-death sequence, with where I had been.

What the fuck was I doing all this shit for everyday, talking, working, eating, fixing bits of the house, preparing shit etc.

I even got a little spooked. Felt cold. Probably because I was coming back so fast from that other place, or thought realm, I can only call it the universe, and I hadn't quite touched down or something..

I have considered the very same paradox many times over and over (not the pube) and have had all different levels of reaction, sometimes confused, other times bored with it all, investigative, etc but anyhow nothing is real took me back to the real sweat I broke out into last night.

First the pube and then nothing.

Don''t pluck the fucker unless you are ready to go. And be prepared for the landing!

Ok Hugo I let you win your "election" now give me your oil.

George W.

The Greco/Roman Had these fricken bottles of Chinoto or something. That black shit. Tastes Ok really. Good and harsh and dry which, if you are off the spritzers aint a bad thing. Anyway, next evening (seeing I was off the piss) I go and buy one of those tall bottles of clear sambucca, and then thought what the fuck. And there you have it: the Greco/Roman! (Trademark pending) Now if you are really fucked up, you could put in Ricard or Pernod instead and call it a Franco/Roman. Note: Ice might be getting a little too fancy for this one.

PM "Honest John"! the Great Dissembler of Australian politics, has lied his way to the top office in the land, and soon his lies will send him spiralling back down into political oblivion where he justly belongs.

That cheating commie Chavez is claiming victory when the results haven't even beeen cleared! It's time we dealt with this terrorist timebomb sitting only a few hundred miles away. Let's take him out and liberate the people of Venezuela otherwise we'll end up with another Fidel.

Raspberry Cordial

ahhh, that's my boy.

Trucker Dan

And you Eva are a fish stinking whore. I wouldn't touch your tush with my ten foot barge pole and that aint no joke. Now, Trevor on the other hand......

Unlike George W Bullshit, Hugo Chavez actually WAS elected democratically - TWICE! But the holier-than-thou, above-the-law Yanks will keep pouring money and dodgy "advisers" into the losing Venezualan gentry's "opposition forces" until they get the result they want. OIL again!

Well it looks like the socialist ratbag Chavez is going to lose. Just watch as he, like all good left-wing fruitcakes, blames the US for this state of affairs.

Patriot

I never touched her!!!

Trev

Trucker, you are so full of it. Fritz' pinkel is much prouder than your shrivelled worm will ever be. Even after the cialis darling Trevor was much finer!

EVA