Created: Thursday, 01 February 2007 Written by DOCTOR_BENWAYDid I come out of retirement for this load of shit?
;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) As a pure scientist, staying aloof and untainted
by the filthy animal dispositions of those that
I have the unpleasant duty to observe - I feel
that I am uniquely qualified to tell you that
your awful, grotesque laughable prime parasite
is a fucking junkie! Oh yes, he may not be on the
needle, but he's a junkie alright! I seen them
before in my surgery. Little men with big ideas,
filthy with a "reform" addiction as big as a galaxy.
Can't fix 'em. All you can do is get them dosed-up
on Haloperidol(TM) when they aren't watching.
After a few weeks of being on high-dose neuroleptics,
their rotten bodies are locked right up with severe
extrapyramidal reactions - tongue sticks right-out!
Well do I give them Cogentin to help them out?
Fuck no! They don't know it exists. I prescribe a
bit of electroshock don't I? It gets tasty after that,
and I usually get interested in the strange progression
of their condition, which by now is mainly irreversible
You can cut right into their brains at this point and
who can tell what difference it makes anyway?
Did I tell you about the time a big-shot politician
got referred to my Recreational Psychiatry unit, and
we all took turns to see what strange new treatments
we could come up with?
I know what you're going to say - where's your ethics?
what about the Hippo-fucking-cratic oath?
Well it's so much fun to see these "leaders of men"
gimping around with only two percent brain function,
it just relieves the boredom something fierce!
Yes, medical ethics - got no use for it myself.
Ultimately, unnecessary in scientific circles.
Anyway, it's still a useful ideal, I suppose.